The Weatherman

England - hopes, dreams, and failure

12:20pm Monday 21st June 2010

I hosted a World Cup party on Friday night to herald in a glorious England win. Obviously things didn't quite go to plan.

Will we win the World Cup? - No.

Ealing Times: COME ON ENGLAND!: The tension mounts for fans in The Terrace pub

12:19pm Sunday 20th June 2010

You see, I told you it would happen, the World Cup has burst into life.

Goals, goals, goals - we'd like some please

11:26pm Wednesday 16th June 2010

I think I speak for most football fans when I say WE NEED MORE GOALS.

Style over substance - World Cup managers step out in style

Ealing Times: Fabio Capello

10:40am Tuesday 15th June 2010

I'm particularly enjoying the managers and their vast array of outfits on show.

World Cup wallchart - a must for every man

10:38am Tuesday 15th June 2010

Although I join in, I find the concept of a wallchart a bit baffling.

Fours years on, and the dream is almost over already

Ealing Times: Robert Green can’t get back in time after Clint Dempsey’s speculative shot slipped through his fingers

10:22am Tuesday 15th June 2010

Saturday night, England v USA, and it was England's World Cup encapsulated in 45 minutes.

Invitation to join the elite

5:10pm Thursday 2nd April 2009

The Weatherman considers an invitation to join Mensa while knocking the final nails into his home-made garden table and chairs...

Causes of irritation

5:00pm Thursday 26th March 2009

The Weatherman lets off some steam as his phone starts to ring for the umpeenth time... was it really necessary to send him that press release?

The official start of summer

9:50am Thursday 19th March 2009

The Weatherman takes pleasure in the official arrival of summer and looks forward to brighter days, cool drinks and driving around with the window down. If only he didn't keep receiving these pointless press releases...

What a pain at the party

11:09am Thursday 12th March 2009

The Weatherman is nursing a sore thumb after an accident at a 1980s-themed party - clearly time travel is a dangerous thing. However, he's far from impressed with the latest 21st Century craze... just what is all this twittering about?

Back to the 80s

4:37pm Thursday 5th March 2009

The Weatherman is going to a 1980s party... Should he choose his costume from the grimy punk era or the boom years? just so long as it's not too outrageous...

Quashed at the quiz

9:36am Friday 20th February 2009

The Weatherman decides to take part in a pub quiz. It was a breeze... until the questions started.

Sense gets lost in the snow

11:26am Thursday 5th February 2009

The Weatherman tries to act bemused as grown men revert to child-like behaviour at the sight of snow... oh what the heck, let's play snowballs!

How to break a hammer

4:28pm Thursday 29th January 2009

The Weatherman reports on the latest developments in his carpentry project and is shocked to discover that wood is capable of breaking metal...

Wigs and woodwork

9:31am Thursday 22nd January 2009

The Weatherman shares some curious insights into the workings of the legal system and the art of furniture making.

Dinner fit for a duke

9:59am Thursday 22nd January 2009

The Weatherman rolls up his sleeves, opens the recipe book and cooks up a classic dish - pity there wasn't enough for us in the office to have a taste...

Time for plans and changes

11:14am Thursday 8th January 2009

The Weatherman has set himeself a creative task for the year ahead - he has a few suggestions for things other people could create as well, such as a few more road signs...

A time to look back

12:59pm Wednesday 24th December 2008

The Weatherman takes a moment to look back over his first year in office... it's been an interesting time.

Make them all sing

9:49am Thursday 18th December 2008

The Weatherman has an idea to make sports personalities more interesting - make them sing and dance...

'Tis the season of odd stories

9:31am Thursday 11th December 2008

The Weatherman sifts through his mail and finds curious press releases about reindeer... Christmas must be coming.

Terror on the ice

12:34pm Thursday 4th December 2008

The Weatherman survived his attempt at ice skating and laments the possible loss of a great Christmas tradition...

Ordinary people are sexy too

11:15am Thursday 27th November 2008

The Weatherman is miffed because he wasn't invited to enter himself in the poll for sexiest man alive and concerned for his housemate's gaffs in the dating game. He fears his friend may be skating on thin ice...

Rage against technology

2:36pm Thursday 20th November 2008

The Weatherman is in a stormy mood after spending far too long trying to get himself connected to the internet...

Running for power

9:44am Thursday 13th November 2008

The Weatherman has been seen running through the streets with his trusty laptop under his arm... is he chasing an exclusive, hold-the-front-page story? Well he might be but he can't write a word until he finds somewhere with a plug to recharge the battery.

The real US election star

9:30am Thursday 6th November 2008

The Weatherman puts in a late night to watch the US election coverage. He's not so interested in the results, it's the slip-ups made by the presenters he enjoys...

Weathering the streets of Harrow

10:09am Thursday 30th October 2008

The Weatherman is leaving the building - no, he's not leaving the paper, just spending more time on the streets of Harrow, watching the weather and finding more news. Look out of the window, he could be walking along your street now...

Blind date panic

10:38am Monday 27th October 2008

The Weatherman has agreed to go on a blind date and he's starting to worry... why hasn't she called him back and, if she does, where is he going to take her? Will they even get on?

Strike up the whistle band

3:49pm Thursday 16th October 2008

The Weatherman suggests the best use for limited funds in these cash-strapped times and wonders what some of these celebrities are really famous for...

On holiday, in trouble

4:08pm Thursday 16th October 2008

The Weatherman jets off on holiday with his parents and reports from Memphis... eventually.

Fix that window!

9:40am Thursday 2nd October 2008

The Weatherman is setting out on the campaign trail. He's not after election to high office, he just wants to get a broken window fixed...

Nobody wants to sympathize

9:44am Thursday 25th September 2008

The Weatherman is looking for sympathy after a series of unfortunate accidents. Nobody seems to be offering him any, though. It might have something to do with him preparing to go off on another holiday...

Blazing dinner for hot date

9:30am Thursday 18th September 2008

The Weatherman's favourite road sign has been dismatled, preparation of the romantic dinner started a small fire and there was a motorcyclist riding the wrong way down the road... it's been an annoying week...

The end was never nigh

9:33am Thursday 11th September 2008

There may have been been some nerves on Wednesday morning as the boffins switched on their big bang machine but The Weatherman was wasn't bothered. It wasn't in his forecast so it wasn't going to happen...

Signs of the times

9:39am Thursday 4th September 2008

The Weatherman has been spending a lot of time on the road this week - he's even started listing his favourite road signs...

When the holiday's over

2:10pm Monday 1st September 2008

The Weatherman eases himself back behind the weather desk and contemplates the bleak prospect of life with no more holiday to look forward to for another year...

Putting Bot on the map

9:21am Thursday 21st August 2008

The Weatherman's wanderings take him into rural Spain where petrol stations become party venues. Bot, in the heart of the Catalan mountains, is the place to be!

Drinks on the postman

9:46am Thursday 14th August 2008

The Weatherman has finally managed to make contact from the depths of rural France. He's been struck by the friendliness of the local postmen who, apparently, make a habit of buying rounds of drinks for visiting weather watchers...

Where's The Weatherman gone?

10:01am Thursday 7th August 2008

Last week The Weatherman promised us regular updates from his tour of the back roads of Europe. We eagerly watched our email baskets, waiting for the promised tales of sand and sangria... and we're still waiting...

Coping without Carol

10:29am Thursday 31st July 2008

The Weatherman is off to foreign shores in search of sun and sangria and a break from British television - anything to help him cope with the loss of Carol from Countdown...

What's wrong with a spritzer?

5:18pm Thursday 24th July 2008

The Weatherman refuses to bow to peer pressure and stands his ground at the bar - line up the spritzers.

The wonders of technology

9:42am Thursday 17th July 2008

The Weatherman has been issued with a shiny new laptop but he still isn't happy. It's probably best to leave him alone until he's finished banging on the desk...

Something to do with diet

5:30pm Thursday 24th July 2008

The Weatherman has a sly grin on his face this week... apparently that Lee McQueen had a touch of stomach trouble on his first day at Sir Alan's - perhaps he's been eating the wrong kind of food?

A very silly hat-trick

5:53pm Thursday 24th July 2008

The Weatherman has been blighted with misfortune, near-misses and acts of foolishness - not all of them his own...

Accepting the olive branch

9:29am Thursday 26th June 2008

Our Weatherman fears he has lost touch with youth culture after being baffled by an overheard phone call. it's time to embrace a gracious approach to life and steer clear of feuds, fights and the 2012 London Mayoral election...

Bitten by Big Brother

9:34am Thursday 19th June 2008

The last crumbs of the weather hat were hardly wiped from the Weatherman's mouth before he started making predictions about Big Brother... will he never learn?

Fancy that - an edible hat

Ealing Times: The Weatherman admires his edible hat.

9:30pm Wednesday 11th June 2008

Last week The Weatherman was hunting for an edible hat after Lee McQueen made it through to the last week of The Apprentice. A kindly reader came to his rescue...

Did I really say that?

9:48am Thursday 5th June 2008

The Weatherman is rather worried today... a flippant remark made about a contestant on The Apprentice at the start of the series has come back to haunt him. How does make an appetising meal out a hat?

Put the award over there...

9:24am Thursday 29th May 2008

The Weatherman believes he must be in line for a major award after going to the rescue of a fox in peril without any thought for his own safety in those treacherous stinging nettles... just put the medals and statuettes over there... thank you, thank you, thank you...

There's nowhere to hide

10:09am Friday 23rd May 2008

The Weatherman is rather annoyed about Boris Johnson's decision to scrap the Londoner free newspaper... it was rather useful to hide behind when you wanted to avoid someone on the late night bus.

All lost at the supermarket

10:48am Thursday 15th May 2008

Our poor weatherman goes for his weekly shop and finds he has walked into a nightmare - nothing seems to be where he thought it would be, not even his car...

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